Laura Loomer’s Defamation Deposition Will Make Your Head Explode

Laura Loomer’s deposition against HBO late-night host Bill Maher has offered absurd new insights into the woman unofficially tasked with federal staffing decisions.

The self-appointed “loyalty enforcer” has had enormous success influencing the Trump administration from the safety of her X account: An analysis by The Daily Beast found that at least 16 individuals were fired from the federal government after Loomer singled them out as covert Democratic agents.

But more than 200 pages of Loomer’s transcribed deposition in her defamation lawsuit against Maher shed light on the influencer’s beliefs and prerogatives—and illustrate her as a raving conspiracist rather than a fine-tuned firing machine.

In sprawling answers to completely unrelated questions, Loomer rants about George Stephanopolous, her lack of boyfriends, and her inability to get a White House press credential, in an interview that quickly flies off the handle.

In one particularly wild exchange, Loomer practically roasted Representative Marjorie Taylor Greene as someone who puts “roast beef in her pants.”

“What is your basis for saying she put Arby’s in her pants?” Maher’s legal counsel asked.

“She carries roast beef in her pockets,” Loomer responded.

“What is your basis for saying she puts roast beef in her pockets and in her pants?” the counsel pressed.

“Because I know she likes to eat at Arby’s,” Loomer said, further clarifying that she believes Greene puts the meat sandwiches in her pants and that she believed Greene would agree with that statement.

“Are you making a derogatory comment about her sex life by talking about Arby’s in her pants?” the counsel asked.

“No. I’m talking about Arby’s, the sandwiches. I’m talking about Arby’s. I would—I’m a very direct person,” Loomer said. “If I was making a derogatory comment, I would have said it.”

Immediately after the Arby’s exchange, Loomer offered another gem without provocation: She believed Senator Lindsey Graham is gay.

“Several of President Trump’s staff have told me in confidence that Lindsey Graham is gay,” Loomer said.

“Hold on, Ms. Loomer, there’s no question,” responded Maher’s attorney.

The man at the head of President Trump’s cruel, indiscriminate immigration crackdown also has perplexingly bad taste in condiments, according to his wife.

Katie Miller, herself a former Trump aide, hosted Vice President JD Vance on her new self-titled podcast aimed toward right-wing women. The conversation turned to a classic icebreaker question.

“If you could only eat one condiment for the rest of your life what would it be?” Miller asked Vance.

“One condiment?” Vance asked.

“Yeah.”

“Does barbecue sauce count?”

“Yeah.”

“Ok. Barbecue sauce.”

“Not mayonnaise?” Miller asked, entirely unprompted.

“No,” Vance said, with a look of slight repulsion. “Mayonnaise is like … in low doses it’s good, but it’s kind of … like I had a buddy who used to eat french fries with mayonnaise. I thought that was disgusting.”

“It’s the only thing my husband eats,” Miller said plainly.

“With french fries, or like period?”

“Period.”

“OK, wow. Didn’t realize.”

“Yeah he’s only a mayonnaise guy.”

“Ok, I learned something new about Stephen I didn’t know.”

“Yeah it’s … whatever,” Miller replied, while Vance offered up a canned chuckle.

Republican Majority Leader Steve Scalise went on Fox Business to display his wild, willful ignorance regarding “public broadcasting.”

Scalise, who represents Louisiana, helped lead GOP efforts to eliminate the Corporation for Public Broadcasting, which will put hundreds of free, local stations and shows in jeopardy. His response? His constituents should just pay for it.

“Getting rid of the USAID, public broadcasting—look, if you wanna go watch public broadcasting you can pay for it,” Scalise told Fox Business’s Maria Bartiromo. “You know, people that wanna watch your show, and a lotta people do, they can pay good advertising dollars because it’s a popular show. If nobody’s watching your program—they’re too many options today in cable programming to have taxpayers funding to the tunes of tens of billions of dollars. We got rid of that wasteful spending, and it’s just the beginning.”

This is not how public broadcasting works, or any publicly funded service for that matter. American citizens already are paying for public broadcasting, and they were receiving worthwhile content in return, from emergency weather alerts to educational content like Ken Burns documentaries and Sesame Street. And even if they weren’t, Scalise’s argument would likely leave mostly poor Americans in rural areas he wants to take public broadcasting from paying even more.

This isn’t about waste, fraud, and abuse. It’s about Republicans and their yearslong war against Corporation for Public Broadcasting–funded institutions like PBS and NPR. For years, the networks have been targeted by conservatives, who frame them as deeply ideological propaganda rather than basic media. Only time will tell how their own constituents will be impacted.

In 1991, Donald Trump filed for bankruptcy for the first time. He is said to have posed as his own publicist in a phone interview. He judged a “Look of the Year” modeling event, whose contestants reportedly included teenage girls as young as 14. His friendship with Jeffrey Epstein was still in bloom.

And the Soviet Union was on its last legs: 1991 was the year it would dissolve. It was also the last year the Russian city now known as St. Petersburg would be called Leningrad.

It was this time to which the president’s mind apparently strayed on Wednesday morning, when he accidentally referred to St. Petersburg by its former name in a social media post.

Trump had taken to Truth Social to disparage the media for covering criticisms of his impending summit with Russian President Vladimir Putin. The choice to hold the meeting in Alaska had drawn critics, among them Trump’s onetime national security adviser John Bolton, who told CNN: “The only better place for Putin than Alaska would be if the summit were being held in Moscow. So the initial setup, I think, is a great victory for Putin.”

The president reprimanded the press for reporting on this, and for “constantly quoting fired losers and really dumb people” like Bolton.

“Very unfair media is at work on my meeting with Putin,” Trump said. So unfair, he wrote, that, “if I got Moscow and Leningrad free, as part of the deal with Russia, the Fake News would say that I made a bad deal!”

It’s unclear what “freeing” those cities would mean, even in the context of this hyperbolic hypothetical.

Anyway, many observers were quick to note the “Leningrad” slip—which, to be sure, was still not as egregious as a gaffe, also regarding the upcoming summit, that the president had made two days earlier, when he incorrectly stated twice that it was taking place in Russia. (If the president’s Wednesday post was a 34-year throwback to 1991, his Monday remarks turned back the clock over a century and a half, to when Alaska was still Russian territory.)

President Trump’s vaguely positive views on marijuana use and legalization have opened up yet another schism within the MAGA movement, as some hard-liners are reverting back to war on drugs–adjacent rhetoric to express their opposition to perhaps the most popular plant in America.

Last Friday it was reported that Trump told donors at an event that he is considering reclassifying marijuana from its current Schedule I level. It was the first time he’d made any real mention of the substance since he was on the campaign trail in September, where he also expressed support for rescheduling. Moving weed away from Schedule I would essentially make it easier to buy, sell, possess, and tax. It’s worth noting that Kim Rivers, CEO of the massive marijuana company Trulieve, was in attendance.

This news quickly sowed trouble on the right, as both the “western civilization is eroding” guys and the more traditional “just say no” crowd shared their grievances with marijuana.

“Our society thrived when everyone was smoking cigarettes and drinking whiskey,” wrote Daily Wire commentator Matt Walsh, completely ignoring the countless, well-documented, negative impacts (violence and death) of those two American vices. “We became the most powerful nation in the world with liquor and nicotine. No country of potheads has ever thrived, or ever achieved anything at all. Every city that legalized it became an even bigger shithole basically overnight. The entire history of western civilization tells us that marijuana is far, far worse for society.”

Far-right conspiracy theorist Jack Posobiec called people smoking weed outside a “huge factor” in violent crime in Washington, D.C. “States with legal weed you can just smell it all over in public,” he continued. “Can’t take kids anywhere.”

“Not that I trust CNN’s reporting, but on the off chance this is true, I’d encourage the White House to nix it,” conservative Daily Wire podcaster Michael Knowles wrote on X. “Liberalizing the law around Haitian oregano gives big Kim Kardashian energy—not the sort of thing people voted for in November!”

Not everyone on the MAGA right shares the same antiquated, Nancy Reagan–level mythmaking around marijuana.

“You know who doesn’t want marijuana moved from Schedule I -> III? Big Pharma— they lose $$ on pain pills & sleeping meds. Big Alcohol—lower revenue. Big Prison—fewer inmates & lower revenue,” wrote Rogan O’Handley, a.k.a. DC Draino, one of the MAGA influencers who got one of those phony “Epstein Files Phase One” binders months ago. “You know who wants it rescheduled? Veterans with PTSD & sleeping issues who don’t want to keep taking pills. Rescheduling marijuana doesn’t legalize it, but it does allow for more medical research.” The weed for veterans angle is very popular within the movement’s pro-rescheduling wing.